Tuesday, January 5, 2010

ohgod SHUT UP.

Blonde Ambition is on a mission ...

She is making forms, writing notes, creating outlines...

She is laying down the law.

She apparently is fearful that there haven't been enough funerals and how in the HECK is she supposed to get her hair dyed and her nails did? I am guessing that her 10 years of being Big Bosses wife (and her prior experience as an aerobics instructor) has given her enough experience in running a funeral home- that she is fully qualified to write up these "laws"....oh- and because she carries Big Bosses balls around in her purse.

What is a little bit odd is that she is making these rules to change "the bullshit that is going on around here" for three funeral directors. One of them being her husband who hasn't followed a rule in the 2.5 years I have been here. It is kind of like when you were a kid and built a fort with one friend, and creating a "club" then electing a president (and only wins because the fort is mostly made with his dads old lumber) and the president gets to make all the rules for that one other kid. (And then the kid revolts and wants his twenty-five cent joining fee back.)

It will be an interesting day tomorrow as she calls us all into a meeting- and hands out her packets. I predict tears at some point or another. We have a delicate flower on staff.... and we all will be blamed as to why they can't have their monthly professional decorator come in for a "revamp", or why they weren't able to buy some antique or another from the last trip to Chicago that they went on.... or why we aren't having a holiday brunch....

Blonde Ambition quote of the day:

Big Boss showed her one of the memorial cards he created for a deceased who used to work on staff with the Milwaukee Brewers. He took a photo of the stadium and faded it out into the background and then put name of the deceased, date of birth-- date of death.. yadda yadda... on top of it... pretty simple-- and it looked nice... her comment was (in her blonde Kentucky drawl) "OH! Are they changing the name of the stadium to his name?"

*blink*

no.

They aren't.

That is his memorial card. Miller Brewing Company owns the stadium. They aren't changing the name of the guy who sold tickets for them.

omg. I almost died.

8 comments:

Amy said...

What a soap opera! She carries his balls around in her purse! FUNNY! I guess you need to start finding some wealthy people to "off."

C.I.W. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Amy said...

oh, what was deleted?

C.I.W. said...

Me. I just was yabba dabba doin' about the owner and the name of the f.h.. names and all. doi!

Mel's Way or No Way said...

What an awkward situation to be in. It never works when the business owner's wife tries to come in and take control, especially with no experience.

Good luck with that one tomorrow.

Jen said...

What a dumb ass.

jelly said...

big dum dum head! ;-)

Amy said...

can't wait to hear what happened today!