distractions

As anyone that has gone through this process of waiting.. for a smiley face, to POAS, to go to the doc, to wait for home visits...for another caseworker meeting... however it is that you go about your process of waiting for your family, you know how it can be. You also know how all consuming it is. Thinking about it CONSTANTLY. All consuming. LITERALLY. I have a new distraction in person form. I was on facebook one night and suddenly there is a friend request from 1/2 of a couple that I knew years ago when I lived up'nort. I about died. She and her other 1/2 broke up after 17 years together. We had a lot of catching up to do. From that moment on (a couple of weeks ago), I have been talking to her a LOT. More than any of my other friends. To the point that Mic asked me if I was leaving her. I know she knows I am NOT leaving her.. but that is how abrupt it was. My friend and I picked up where we left off. She talks. A lot. I listen and ask questions- I am good at that. She is also almost computer illiterate (I call her ex-Amish-- she knows sorta how to get around on facebook.. and that about sums it up.) so she calls me and it forces me to talk on the phone...in the MORNING. Anyone who knows me knows that I will do whatever I can to get out of a phone conversation. After being on the phone all day at work.. it is the LAST thing I want to do. We don't talk about anything special. She talks a lot about her ex.. and I know her, and I am the only other gay person in her life that does know her... so I think that makes her feel comfortable. She talks about her mom and sister who I know-- her dad..work.. stuff like that. As I was driving to work today it hit me like a brick... I like talking to her because I haven't told her about the foster/adopt process yet. I have told her all about Mic and I and everything we do... but not THAT. I have all of this time to NOT talk about it... to not think about it... to not OBSESS about it. I don't have to talk about caseworkers or what-if's or what if-not's and everything that goes along with it. I don't have to cry or wonder or worry. I just have to talk about nothing and listen to her talk about her life. At first I felt guilty that I was talking to her SO MUCH. But now, I don't want to stop. It gives me time to NOT think about waiting.. to concentrate more on my relationship with Mic, to have other things floating around in my brain instead of baby stuff... suddenly I am looking forward to doing fun things in the summer, to introducing her to all of my friends, to have her as part of Mic's and my circle. Today is going to be a good day because it is just GOING to be. No tears, extra prayers, no daydreams.. just a day to enjoy. Thassit. *exhale*

Day 9-A picture of your friends

I have been working a trade expo for days.. and I am tired.... and I have to work again tomorrow. So. Lemme see what I can dig up on this laptop...because I don't feel like going downstairs.

Upside of the expo: there are a LOT of lesbos that want to renovate their home.. and I get to look at them. so... yah. thats nice, I guess.

okay. I looked for pictures. I can't put any from this computer that my friends who read this wouldn't say "DEAR GOD, CASEY, TAKE THAT DAMN PICTURE OFF YOUR BLOG!!!"

so. I am gonna play it safe on this one.

Day 8-A place you’ve traveled to

Suddenly I am finding this 30 day thing kinda boring.. where is the meat here? Don't you want saucy, dirty, juicy? About me and sex, love, life, food, embarrassing moments, poop stories and whatever else?

Anyways.. .what was the question? where have I traveled?

Uh.

Here.
(Ireland)
And here..

(Mexico City)

And here... (Appleton.)

Obviously I have been many more places....I should write about the fun and the meaning of the trip. Let me sum it up here: I probably drank a bit in each place and at one time made out with a bunch of guys... and later in my life.. made out with chics instead. I am sure some really funny stuff happened where ever it was. I have fun when I travel.

In conclusion: take a trip with me, I will buy you a drink and force you to make out with people.

What's tomorrow... Day 9: What I had for breakfast. ?

Day 7-Favorite movies

Easy Cheesy (I invite you to clicksie)

Grey Gardens

40 Year old Virgin

Silence of the Lambs

I am also in love with every gay and lesbian movie I rented from Blockbuster on video tape when I was making my journey out... any movie I saw with a special someone, most documentaries and some soft porn (haha)

that would be a big list. so just use your imagination :)

Day 6-A picture of something that makes you happy

This is probably going to be one of the hardest for me. I could put a gazillion pictures. I will try to narrow it down though. Please note that I am limited to the photos that are on my laptop. So sue me if you aren't shown.

My dog, Cosmo - we thought it would be a fabulous idea to get a new puppy just 3 months into our relationship! why not??? This is at my old apartment -- he used to fit on the bottom of my computer desk. Now, he is 106lbs and takes up a whole bed. Here is my dear friend, Amy (I call her Nonny) We are in the dorm room at college getting ready for a night on the town. We are going for white and whiter. My perm courtesy of the girl in beauty school down the hall from us.
Mo, Me and Greg. State Fair. Priceless. I love them. My wiff and I on our "honeymoon" camping. The picture of happy :)

Missing photos of: family, geocaching, my neighbors, my co workers, my bike, hiking trails, my bed, aveda products, q-tips, sunscreen.. I could go on.

SIDENOTE: I just finished typing this and I turned to Mic and said... "can you believe we got Cosmo after being together for 3 months??? Did you know in your heart that you were going to be together for a long time at that point??? "

She turned to me and said, "NO! I mean.. that is 90 DAYS! People go to rehab for 90 days.. How would I know that we were going to be together??"

She abruptly stopped that thought after my glare burned through her skin.

Time to play some catch up...

Mo and Greg have departed after a fun 24 hours of lunch/Harley Davidson Museum/Dinner/wine/more drinks to celebrate Reb's b-day/drag show/dancing/drinks and this morning an estate sale (and found awesome stuff we didn't know we needed until we saw it).

I.am.exausted. Just to add to it, I wasn't even drinking after my two glasses of yummy wine at dinner. Why am I the only one who can't keep my eyes open?

Back to it...

Day 5-Your siblings
I am the fourth child. I have an older brother who is almost 48, I think. I also have two sisters (twins) who are 46. There is 8 years difference between my sisters and I. So, instead of being the youngest of four, it often felt as if I was the only child. My sisters had each other to chum around with and they kind of lived in their own little twin world. My brother was so much older than me that I don't remember much of him growing up. My memories start when he was out of the house already. I don't really remember much of him living at home. I know he did. I just blocked it out, apparently.

My sisters are beautiful and have wonderful children and husbands that I don't think are good enough for them. My brother was married at one point and is now divorced. He has suffered with a series of strokes. He is fine, but has made poor choices in his life. We have all tried to help him MANY times - but he continues to go down a path that isn't taking him anywhere - and quickly. I have stepped away from the situation, as he is an adult and if he feels he doesn't need help, that is his decision.

Growing up I remember thinking my sisters were my other moms. They liked bossing me around. They still do :). I remember mom and dad leaving and them having huge house parties, and I would be upstairs in my bed. They would skip out of school a lot and have me get their pink slips out of the mailbox before my mom and dad would come home (I was a latch key kid). They loved giving me horrible perms and trying to teach me how to dress and wear make up. We weren't close then but as adults have grown much closer.

I think that is all I want to share right now about them. I adore my siblings.... and I am in the frame of mind (kind of cranky) (and heard more stuff about my brother today) that I am on the verge of saying something that I shouldn't share - and/or regret in the future.

I am going to have to wait for more catch up until after my nap. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Ohnoooooooo

I missed a post :(

But for good reason: Fish Fry Friday. Then I came home and cleaned the house in preparation of Mo and Greg coming to town!!!

I may miss tomorrow's post too!!!!!! I will catch up- pinky swear!!!

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