hrm.

I have been tracking my ovulation since the time I thought I should be... 13 days after the first day of my period. This month, though-- my period was late, and just.. weird. This usually happens once a year- and it usually is in the beginning of summer. I don't know WHY that is-- but, that is the case. Is anyone else like this? Anyways- I have been peeing on the sticks, and i haven't really seen an evidence that I have ovulated. I was using the T*arget brand, and just thought I would try a different brand. Now I am using Answer. What I have read, there may be months that you don't ovulate.. or some womans cycle is longer than others. I suppose I can't really draw any conclusions until I have more data. I am just going to have to keep peeing-- and see where that gets me.

This weekend was a lot of fun- we went out and got some cheap-o tennis rackets -- (racquet's??) and hit the courts early on Saturday morning-- I suck. I admit it... but we had some great laughs (and this morning I could hardly get out of bed). Mic's b-day is tomorrow, so we were celebrating it on Saturday with some friends... we also celebrated Angela's b-day which was last week. We went out for some pizza and then off to a drag show. My god- how things have changed since I saw one a million years ago in Neenah at the Pivot Club. These 'gal's' looks faaaabulous! I was giving out dollars like they were growing on trees. Then we went out dancing and met up with people we haven't seen in a long time. Tomorrow I will be packing up some homemade cookies for her to take to work. I plan on putting them on my "It's Your Special Day" plate, and put them on the front seat of her car for a little surprise. For the last three years all she has wanted is a hammock. I have finally found one that I hope she will like-- part one was delivered to work this past week - and the stand should be there tomorrow. I don't know if I will have time to set it up-- but at least she will get it all at one time-- I don't know that she has any idea, and I hope to catch her off guard. I never am able to surprise her!

Okay-- going to get some reading done. I am reading "In to the Wild". I am loving it.

What to do...

I have been talking with a friend about what to do in order to get out of the house.... and get involved. We talked about scrap booking, cooking classes, art classes... things of that nature. On my way home today I was speaking with my mom over the phone, and she brought up this place called Kathy's House. A little background -- I was in a 7 year relationship with a woman named Lisa who passed away a year and a half ago from ovarian cancer at the age of 30. She and I were not "together" at the time- though I knew from the moment we broke up that I would always be a part of her life, and she of mine. Many webs tangled together, and we stayed very close... and I ended up being one of her main caregivers at her end of life. She stayed at Kathy's House when she would have to come into Milwaukee for chemo and other treatments. They are a "home away from home" for people in similar situations... when you have to go to a different city for major treatments, and don't have anywhere to go.. need transportation etc. It worked out wonderfully as they were able to take her to the hospital when I had to work, and they would just .. take care of her, when I physically couldn't be with her. So, because of that, instead of taking a class in something that I may or may not use-- or spend a ton of money on supplies etc-- then have them collect dust... I have decided to volunteer some time at Kathy's House. I have contacted them with a list of my abilities, but I honestly will do whatever. So, not only am I going to get out of the house.. I am going to be able to honor a very important person in my life.

Fresh Start

I have had journals online for as long as I can remember-- from Blurty to Livejournal to Myspace and blah blah blah. I love the idea of journaling online-- and I have really met some great people doing it. There was a time and reason for all of them-- Now it is time to move forward.. a time to close doors on the past - and open doors to the future.. but enjoying every moment of my life RIGHT NOW.

As a 34 year old, living in Milwaukee, who is in head over heals love with the woman of my dreams-- we are soon going to be joining the bandwagon of gazillions of lesbos around the world and trying our hand at starting a family of our own. I am one of the clueless ones, though-- I have a chart-- but I don't know how to use it, I have peed on sticks, though I haven't once taken a picture of them... I feel like I am behind the times! We have decided to be as natural as possible. We have contracts, and have paid money (uhh.. okay-- don't know what is NATURAL about all that rigamaroll) and have a donor.. now we are just hoping for the best. We have decided to try, to desire, to pray, to hope.. but we also have decided to not go overboard. I do NOT judge others-- this is just our journey. We are starting in August, and well, we will see where it goes from there.

So, there is much much more to me than just this whole "baby" shtuff..

um.

yuuuppp..

there.. iisssss.. uuuhh.

I am just a totally normal gal who works in a funeral home, who has a family who struggles to understand her, and a dog that totally kicks ass.